I keep telling myself I need to wear a medallion. If I only donned one, I would finally feel "complete" and then be the country's foremost expert on gambling - like Jimmy the Greek.
For approximately 22 years, the United States has felt a horrible void because of the loss of Jimmy "The Greek" Snyder. First, he was fired from CBS in 1988 for racist comments, then he died in 1996 from a heart attack.
My daughter Sophie and I are attempting to replace Siskel & Ebert as the country's foremost movie critics. While I am at it, I am going to replace Jimmy the Greek as the nation's top gambling expert and be called "Joey the Polack."
Gambling, of course, is a mega-billion-dollar industry in the U.S., and football is the most bet upon sport in the U.S. Approximately 30 million Americans play fantasy football, and one of six Americans participate in sports gambling, according to my Internet research.
Football season is underway, and I have three tips for NFL bettors.
1) Never under any circumstance bet on the Raiders, Browns or Lions.
2) Try to bet against the popular teams - Cowboys, Steelers, Packers, Patriots and Colts.
3) Pick teams with good defenses. With the proliferation of fantasy football, bettors tend to bet on offenses. It's better to put your money on defenses.
These tips, I believe, are 100 percent valid. However, I am not wearing a medallion to back it up, but soon I will have one like the hip-hop sensation T-Pain.Despite my memories of Jimmy the Greek and his medallion, I was unable to find a picture o him wearing one. I am pretty sure he sported one, though.
The Greek made major news when he made racist comments and was fired. Here were some of those racist words:
"The black is a better athlete to begin with because he's been bred to be that way — because of his high thighs and big thighs that goes up into his back, and they can jump higher and run faster because of their bigger thighs. This goes back all the way to the Civil War when during the slave trading, the owner — the slave owner - would breed his big black to his big woman so that he could have a big black kid."
Yikes. As a Polack, I do not believe I am racist. However, I likely will subconsciously lean toward teams with white socks.